“If you do not want to keep starting over, then stop giving up,” she said. My body moved, but my mind froze as she urged us to start jogging. I warmed up; thoughts still halted, I tried to capture this moment. I wanted to take a snapshot of this feeling. I wanted to be able to scroll back to this photo the next time I sought to rent space in the city of the quitting. There live my dreams and yours.

As Autumn Calabrese said those words at the beginning of my Beachbody workout, I felt all the weight of my failing. As stuck as I was at that moment, my mind raced. I thought about how much further along I would be in my fitness journey if I didn’t give up the last ten times? How well would this blog be doing if I didn’t stop writing? Where would Women In Process be if I had started it three years ago? All those “what ifs” played in my mind.

We are at the beginning of the year and with that comes resolutions. It is said that only 8% of people who make resolutions keep them. There are several reasons why we quit, but I’ll focus on two.

Remember that Marvin Gaye song where he proclaimed to Tammi Terrell, “Ain’t no mountain high enough, ain’t no valley low enough” In the song they were saying that their love can transcend the highs and the lows. I believe we quit or don’t even start on our dreams because of the Mountain High and the Valley Low.

1. Mountain High

The idea is too big. How am I going to get from Walk Manager with the Alzheimer’s Association to this world-renowned speaker and author? It just seems too far-fetched. But success is not one giant leap but rather a commitment to do this thing, whatever it may be, the best you can, every single day.

When we first start a project, we see the big picture. And that is great because at least we know what we want the end result to be. But if we allow that big picture to be anything but a guiding star then we are hurting ourselves. We can not let the fear of accomplishing the task consume us. Take it one step at a time, and before you know it, you’ll be there.

The truth is, it might take years. We are an instant gratification generation. But success comes after what Will Smith says, “years of beating on your craft.” Are you prepared for that type of commitment?  Because that is what it’ll take.

2. Valley Low


Failure sucks. We fear that we will fail or we’ve failed many times already. But the lows, the difficult times, is a necessary component for success. The lessons learned from those mistakes are critical in pushing us to new heights. Just think, Edison failed at the light bulb a thousand times!


Let’s start now and be consistent in our pursuit. Let’s not shy away from tough times, knowing that it’ll be the fuel to propel us forward. See you at the top!


A Woman in Process


I just got back to me. As such, I started to write. I’m a spoken word artist but I haven’t truly put pen to pad in years. To commemorate my new found inspiration. Below please find an oldie but goodie. It’s met to be spoken but I hope you can still feel the words.


She had a date with Mr. Man

In preparation she decided to hold a meeting between her lips and the bottle

As rum burned the insides of her insides, the butterflies died

No longer nervous she approached the situation with calmness and lack of inhibition

She had known him for couple months but this was first true meeting of the minds

She wanted to crack open his skull, chisel away until she unlocked every memory, want and desire

She wanted to know him and in turn he know her

Wanted him to swim along the waves of her every thought, Hold picnics in the central park of her being

She had no idea where the relationship would lead but became fond of exploring the possibilities

Because you see there were these qualities

That he possessed that would send chills up the spine of a paralytic

Rich dark chocolate skin and lips that looked soft to the touch, and eyes that were focused and driven on taking Corporate America by storm

In her young life she had never met anyone like him, as cliché as it may sound it was the truth

She had never met anyone that seemed so in tune with the plan that she saw for herself

Now let us remember she held no expectations, she was just in awe of the manifestation

As if God was showing her representation that He was out there

Her soul mate, her knight in shining armor, her Matthew McConaughey in every romantic comedy  

He was out there, and she became excited, giddy like a school girl

Even if Mr. Man was not the one, there was hope that ones like him still existed

The plan was to spend the night together bring in the light of a new day together

She hoped their minds would connect on the most intimate of levels and a friendship would be born from their passion

They sat in the room and talked for hours until the darkness inside the room matched the one outside the window.

And flickering light from the television matched the stars of the night sky.

She was enjoying the chatter and foresaw no physical embrace that moved beyond the locking of tongues or the meeting of lips

Needless to say she was not ready for what took place in the coming moments

Their lips touched and his lips were just as soft as she envisioned, his hands ran the curves of her body

Her hands felt the shape of his every muscle

He assisted with the removal of every garment

His brown skin pressed against her brown skin and their naked bodies danced in ways that were met for the grown and sexy

He moved in and out never once removing his lips from hers

They played out the words of a romantic novel until the climax

Once the deed was done they laid in bed, she inched as far away as she could

She did not feel regret but there was an emotion that came over her

She had just let this man accomplish the most amazing of feats and she was not sure it he was worthy

Fear manifested as goose bumps on skin of her body

But he pulled her close to him and they slept the night into morning

She awoke inside his arms; he was holding her as tight as if protecting her from the outside world

She felt safe and wanted

She knew there time together was coming to a close, but his eyes reassured her that this was not their last meeting

As they parted ways she felt like the female lead in every romantic comedy, Cinderella at the ball and the lady to his knight